A Weekend In the Life of a Cheer Mom (Or Why the Church Frowns on Suicide)

I could really have used a stiff drink yesterday during my mandatory cheer mom meeting. Already being strung as tight as a prostitute in church (or some other such simile), I was ready to come undone. Why weren't they serving drinks?

I was extremely happy to find out that Friday morning breakfasts with the football moms were not mandatory. Imagine my relief. Were they going to fine us like they used to do in sorority when we missed a function? I truly did not know. LawyerBoy wanted to know if Cheer Dads could attend. I told him that I would pay for his meal if he would just do it. Please. Go.

I had to sign up to help with an after home game dinner for the football players and cheerleaders and co-host a pre-game dinner for the cheerleaders. The football backers also goosestepped in and told us that everyone had to sign up to work the concession stand for one quarter during a home game.

Uh, hell to the no. If you need someone to man that station, talk to the man of my house. I don't work in the food service industry. Never have, never will.

There was lots of gushing - stuff I don't do well. I wasn't a good sorority girl. I don't hold hands and sing Kum Ba Yah. (Or whatever the hell it was we used to sing.) So all this cheerleader love is about to push me past my limit.

And people. With school getting ready to start, I am already one step past my limit.

Tonight is Meet and Greet. I get to spread some cheer among my little homeroom darlings. (And after looking at my list, I am thrilled. I don't know if there are some more Bobs, but you know there will be at least one or two doosies.) I still have a few more logistical things to do with my room and then it is go time. I can't believe it.