Downhill Slide

Read 'em and weep - 29 school days and counting. They can't end this stupid year any faster.

And for the record, Tiger, bless your heart, you are a big, whining, self-absorbed jerk. Not one word about our hospitality, our ability to protect you from a lot of crap, and the field of players who kicked your butt. Phil Mickelson had real problems to overcome this year, not self inflicted ones like you did, you little piss-ant.

From what I heard, they really weren't cheering you on like the press corps would have us believe. Polite clapping from the gallery - the real cheers were for Phil, Lee Westwood, Freddy Couples and K.J. Choi.

Good luck next week. I'm sure Charlotte won't be as kind.

March On!

Will it ever end? March, that is? This year? Oh my word. I figured out, however, how I managed to get through this awful month last year, though. Went on the South Carolina roadtrip - and am proud to say that Prep isn't going to any of the schools we traipsed through last year. But, it was fun!!

So, the first thing in getting through March next year is to take BrownBear on Spring Break. (If I have a job next year.) Even if it means taking it without pay - I don't care. I have to do something to break up this month.

The fifth graders are terrifying this year. I've been teaching on and off since 1986. That year, I was very, very young and I was teaching 9th graders who were 16 and 17 and some of them were pregnant. You can imagine how effective I was.

This year has been worse. The unpreparedness, the lack of respect, the wholescale refusal to do any work on their part - 3/4ths of them are miserable.

But, wait. Is that the tropical breeze of Cancun calling my name? I believe so. June isn't so far away at all.

Baffled by the Bull

Haven't written because of the amount of bull swirling about my head. I am planning for what we are sarcastically referring to as "springtime summer school" and am dealing with the a skinhead family who is causing strife in our grade as well as the picking and name calling that occasionally goes on with 5th graders. (Or maybe not... I've got one throwing around the f bomb.)

This "springtime summer school" has arisen because the county has decided not to pay for summer school for the kids who do not pass the super big state test. We have to decide BEFORE test results come back who HASN'T passed the test and begin prepping them for the re-test, which will be given before school is over for the year. Do I look like the Wizard of Oz? We had to tell parents before we have even given the test that we think their kid is going to fail and we are going to prep them before results come back for a retest that they might not even have to take.

Is anyone in the central office using his brain for anything besides a seat cushion?

Sick Bay

Cardinal rule in Teachergirl's room: if you are sick, HIT THE ROAD. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. The restroom is ONE door down from my classroom. Go for it. We will sort out any misunderstandings later.

I don't do sick - not even my OWN children's sick - so do not expect me to be all mommy/nurse there for you. It makes me gag just to think about it.

Because of the swine flu, I have sent students to the nurse without so much as a second glance. If you think you feel bad, you have my blessing. Go forth and be healed.

Today, one of my students asked to go to the nurse. I didn't hesitate - go, my dear. I may be getting played, but I'm not one to take a chance. The nurse sent her back and I just told her to have a seat and I continued on with math. Not ten minutes later, the sweet girl is throwing up into her hands and running TOWARD my desk. Holy vomitorium, Batman, run out of the classroom, not farther into it!!!!!! Thank goodness, a trash can was right in front of my desk, because if she had barfed ON my desk, full of lesson plans, report cards and a ton of my own junk, I would have fainted. And trust me, I nearly did when I saw what was going on.

The worst of it was the custodian tried to give me my trash can back.

I think I can do without this one.

A Happy New Year!

As vacation winds down, I am looking forward to the future - sort of. At least there are only 90 more days with these rugrats!
But, as happy as I'll be to be done with this year, I am filled with trepidation - Prep is going to graduate in May and I am sure this semester will fly by!
So, Happy New Year and hang on. It's going to be a ride, to say the least. Rough, rocky; whatever.

Was That a Vacation That Just Flew By?

People. Vacation is virtually over. Can you believe it? I cannot.

The students still have Monday off (lucky, lucky), so I can plan and do that other stuff, but I am going to have to deal with that student teacher chick. I also have to give a short presentation first thing with tons of other colleagues on some crappy in-service I attended. (When I say crappy, I don't just mean crappy - I mean the worst possible waste of time and money the state has ever spent on training teachers.)

BrownBear and Prep have real school tomorrow. LawyerBoy has real work tomorrow. At least I get to ease into it. Write a few lesson plans, visit with the girls. Take down the Christmas lights I left around my whiteboard.