Teacher of the Year 2011-2012

No kidding. Thankyouverymuch.

Volcano Day

Yesterday, the volcano project was due. My teaching partner-in-crime had our students present their projects and then we all went outside to watch them erupt.

I sat in the back of her classroom and tried to listen to as all 35 of them talked about how they put their volcanoes together and.... well, I don't know. Because, faithful readers, I had the beginnings of a migraine and I laid my head back on her chair and closed my eyes. And the whirring of the air conditioner... well, I don't know. Maybe I drifted off. Maybe I didn't. But when I did open my eyes, the Assistant Principal was sitting in a chair in front of me.

Alrighty, then.

Thank goodness it was Friday. Thank goodness it is the weekend. Twenty five days and counting.

Democracy In Action

Our school has spent the last year rolling around with the IB program. We sent representatives to the initial training (me, included), we trained faculty members, we have read about units, we have written units; we have immersed ourselves in the stuff. Our parents were in love with the idea, but our principal said that she would let us vote on whether we would continue to pursue IB status.

There is a very vocal opposition in our school (VERY) who fear change and hard work. They managed to scrounge together one more vote than those of us who supported pursuing the IB certification. One vote, people.

My fear is that our principal will leave over this. And trust me, people, we have it great at our school. I have been places where I have had to eat with my students, sign in and out of the building, turn in lesson plans two weeks in advance and other such nonsense. Our principal does not believe in this kind of craziness. These people who voted this plan down have not looked farther than their own noses - they don't have any idea what could be coming down the pike for them. They may have cut off their noses to spite their faces.

And in turn, they may have ruined my perfect world.

First Monday in October

• Supreme Court is back in session. Best job in the Federal Government.
• My neighborhood is already in Halloween mode: fake graveyards and skeletons crawling out of the ground are already popping up all over the place. I don't mind a scarecrow or two, but for heaven's sake people, this isn't Satan Estates. This crap gives me the creeps. And I have a whole month of it to look forward to. Yippee.
• Bob Marley and his new best friend, Bobbette (I kid you not, she did her hair just like his) , faked their way through the reading section of the Iowa Test of Basic Skills and then tried to sleep. NOT ON MY WATCH!!! I was shaking kids awake and making them go over it in the remaining time. Sleeping during a standardized test. Puhleeze.

Why Don't You Just Write Down What I Assign You?

Part of my duties as a fifth grade teacher is to teach Social Studies for my partner next door. She repays the favor by teaching my students Science. That way, her kids learn some History and mine really will learn some Science. ("Now, boys and girls, why does Mrs. Teachergirl teach all the Social Studies?" "Because you took French in college to get out of Science." "Very good! You were listening.") I handed out some worksheets (old quizzes) yesterday, in an attempt to be efficient. I told my partner's students to work on them at will; that I would not be collecting them, grading them or doing anything of the like with them. I would let them see the answers today. It was a STUDY GUIDE and I would be taking the questions for my next quiz DIRECTLY from it.

I get a smart assed note from a parent today, telling me that I am giving precious too much homework. He goes to bed at 10 PM, after all, and this was just too much for him to handle. My first thought was 10 PM? That's when Teachergirl, herself, plops down. And my second thought was write down what I say. Give me a break. Yeah, I'm the biggest moron in the world. I give four pages of homework in one subject on Back to School night.

Back to School

Just a few quick notes:

• I didn't not crash and burn on that big old jet airliner as I previously thought. As a matter of fact, the ride was pretty smooth and I was with another teacher who was coming to the Institute with me. (This flight was brought to you by Xanax.)
• College life is just like you thought it was. Cold water in the showers, hard beds, air conditioning that either works really hard or it doesn't at all. Cafeteria food has improved, but I remember why people put on that freshman 15 (or 40 - Alison!!!)
• Oh, yeah. The fire alarm went off at three o'clock this morning. That was sweet. I couldn't go back to that good sleep, so I feel like I pulled an all nighter. That was after going to bed having been drinking with the other teachers across the street.

I am so tired right now, I don't know how I am going to make it. Lots of coffee - but it is bad, remember? Got three hours of lecture after breakfast and three more after lunch. Then we have to work on Congressional hearing presentations. It is just 7:20 and I need a nap.

It is beautiful here in the Shenanadoah Valley, though, and the weather is cooperating. No humidity - unheard of here in Virginia this time of year and I am most grateful for that. The teachers I am with are a most wonderful group. Friendly, outgoing and not at all the geeky ones I expected. Excellent.

No More Teachers, No More Books, Part Two

Praise the Lord in Heaven. Summer school ends tomorrow. I tested six kids today in reading. By reading the reading test outloud to them. All of it. The passages. The questions. The answer choices. I think I began to hyperventilate at some point. I have a migraine THIS BIG right now. It won't go away. I am going to bed and dream happy dreams.


What am I supposed to do tomorrow?

I have cleaned up my room and turned in all my stuff. The math kids test tomorrow. I am a reading teacher. I believe I will bring a book. It's all good.

Big State Testing Results and the School Superintendent

Thursday, Kathy Cox came out all happy because the state test results came back and made her look good.

If anyone looked really hard at the results, they would have to realize that just passing the test doesn't make anyone really look good. It means that we got the kids ready to take a test. By passing the test with an 800, you have met standards. Meeting standards here means you have mastered about 40% of the material. FORTY PERCENT OF THE MATERIAL. You are not a rocket scientist; you have barely learned what you need to learn for the whatever grade you are in. Spend the summer watching TV and what not and you won't even have a grasp on that 40%.

The very same day, there was an article in the very same paper about a group of teachers who were studying about geography because our students don't have the first idea where anything is located in the world.

Today, the paper has an editorial about how our students don't know anything about history.

That is because we have stopped teaching what is important for what makes us look good. We don't teach them how to think or why it is important to know where things are or why the rules of spelling are important or why this novel is fun to read, just because; the state and federal government wants us to turn these children into robots who can read and calculate just enough to get by. The standards aren't good for teachers and they aren't good for students. Aren't we doing a disservice to the children by trying to make them all fit in the same mold? And aren't we doing ourselves a disservice by not teaching them that education can be fun and beautiful and challenging, all at the same time? Who is going to want to teach if it isn't fun anymore?