Spring Break, Part 2

Love, love, love the quiet little break that doesn't require packing and much movement at all. The beach will be there in 7 weeks, so I am not interested in fighting the teenagers who are cramming into every nook and cranny along the Atlantic and Gulf Coasts. The morons who plan our calendar decided last year that we should come back from Spring Break and take the Big State Test. You read that right - we go back next Monday and start testing Tuesday. I can't explain it, I just have to deal with it. I start knitting class tonight. So excited!! My sister is a great knitter and can knock out lovely baby sweaters - I am hoping to get going really well and then knit a pair of socks. That's my goal. I've made a hat for myself in the past, but socks? Well, they just look hard. And what great Christmas presents! ( And yes, I am thinking about Christmas presents because the morons who plan our calendar have decided that we will be in school until the afternoon of December 23rd. And I have promised to take grades every day that week - if I have to be there, you'd better be there, too. And, no, thankyouverymuch, you aren't going to be able to make them up.) Farmer's Market Saturday was extraordinary! Green beans, beets, squash! Even a few Florida tomatoes. Dinner tonight will be a delish chicken pot pie made by the local pie maker along with some tasty veggies on the side. The Plains were beautiful this weekend. Saw Prep and had a great day with her. We're going to see her two more times - A Day and Easter - and then she'll be home for good on Mother's Day weekend. One more change to get used to!

Twenty and Counting...

That's right, dudes. Twenty school days and counting. And I won't be sad to see most of these go. As a kindergarten teacher once told me, every 180 days, we get a whole new set of employees. And I can't wait.

Four super big state tests are finished and one more to go on Monday. My super student teachergirl's last day was today and for her finale, she caught the lizard that was creeping around the place.

I actually had to sit down and figure out what to do next week. Whew. I almost made her plan for me before she left.

But I'm not that mean. Yet.

I Haven't Fallen Off the Face of the Earth..

However, we are in the middle of Super Big State Testing and I am wiped out. My fifth graders need to pass reading and math in order to be promoted. I don't know if it's looking good or not. I really couldn't tell you; I'm not allowed to look at the questions. Hardly makes sense, does it?

Our writing scores came back, however, and 93% met or exceeded standards. I am pretty impressed. With them and myself.

I must return to the real world, now, because the youth group is coming for the weekend. I don't know how I get talked into these things.

Motherhood.

What's a Girl To Do?

Where to begin? Two days to Super Big State Testing... and I know I don't feel ready. I haven't felt this unprepared in years.

Only one more week with super student teachergirl. I swear - where has the year gone? She is amazing and I hope she gets a job. However, with this stupid economy, I don't see it. She is going to direct the preschool by her house until things settle down.

I am going to send my resume to PrepSchool, where copying happens without question, laptops are handed out to the kids and life goes on as normal. I need to teach some History to someone who might care. I hope someone needs a history teacher as badly as I need a history teaching job.

Thank goodness - five weeks and counting.

I know this sucks, but I've got nothing, people.

No Child Left Behind or What?

My week has been absorbed with test results flowing back from the Big State Test. Apparently, our state department of education is being led by an idiot and her crew. Approximately 70% of our state's 6th and 7th graders failed the Social Studies test and 60% of the 8th graders failed the Math test. Our illustrious leader has decided to throw out the Social Studies results but she is letting the math results stand. It is impossible to go on to the next grade in 5th or 8th grade without passing the Reading and/or Math tests, unless, of course, you go to summer school, retake the test and pass. (If you don't pass, your parents may request a conference with your former principal and teacher and you may be promoted administratively. That information may not be widely known, however.)

All hell's done broken loose, here. It was revealed that people in the State Department of Education knew that students were going to fail the Social Studies test in record numbers and did nothing to prevent it. They told no one. They also knew that the math scores were going to take a rather large dive and also did nothing. Their rationale was that the curriculum and standards had changed, so, of course, some kids were going to fail. What they didn't take into account was the fact that lots of kids who failed the Big State Test were Honors students who had made As and Bs all year long.

As I said, All hell's done broken loose. We're talking summer school, a retest and possible retention for kids who were honors students. I am surprised that our state superintendent hasn't requested a body guard. Parents are calling for her resignation and her recall. Wheeeee!



I have not heard the state failure percentage on 5th grade in math: I know that our school failure rate was right at about 20%. Some of the kids who failed were expected: if you don't know your math facts what do you want me to do? I can't possibly teach you pre-algebra if you can't add, multiply or work with decimals. And that is the whole problem. When the state changed the standards, our glorious leaders didn't take into account those children who haven't, can't, didn't move ahead quickly enough for whatever reason. Our state requires second graders to master multiplication facts.

I'll give you a minute to let that sink in.

Second graders to master multiplication facts. Second graders can barely add with regrouping and yet we expect them to multiply. Hello?

I am all for keeping up with China and Japan and India, but at the same time, I am all for a curriculum that is age appropriate and is it really appropriate for a second grader to be held responsible for multiplication facts? I just don't think so.

But, hey. No one in the Department of Education asked me, or any other teacher, about changing the standards or writing the tests. Trust me. The Social Studies questions would have made sense and the Math questions would have matched what the teachers taught. I guarantee.

And guess who's looking for a slew of summer school math teachers?

Field Day Kicked My Butt

Our annual homage to all things physical started with the chicken dance in the gymnasium at 8:30 AM today. It didn't end until I danced to the mariachi band playing on the playground at 1:45 PM. We played hard today.

Oh yeah. Test scores came this afternoon, too. Only one surprise right out of left field. Creepy principal's daughter passed (BIG HURRAH) and my one kid who I lamented over endlessly passed, too. However, Bob Marley didn't make it through Math and neither did another one of my geniuses who hasn't got a lick of sense. The thing I discovered, though, was that 14 of the 17 kids who didn't make it through math this year were taught by the same teacher in the same class. We do math compacting, which is a fancy way of saying we departmentalize by ability. The majority of the kids who didn't pass were in the lowest class and were served by not one, but two, math teachers. I'm not sure what to say - because all of those kids who failed were not helping themselves - these were the ones who never did any work, who goofed off quite a bit and didn't have much parental support. Even my AP said that one of the kids in my homeroom who failed the math section spent more time playing and staying in trouble than he did worrying about working. Oh, yes. She was referring to Bob Marley.

And speaking of Bob, his mother made an appointment last Wednesday for a conference with the 5th grade team to see what could be done for him and his failing grades. (Are you kidding me?) We had eight days of school left when we had this conference. She reported to us that Bobby was an A/B student and that this was quite unusual for him. It was all that I could do to stay in my seat. I've seen the perm record. The only A s and B s in it are in his name.

Now come on. Bob isn't an A/B student and he isn't gifted. The other members of my team laid it on the line. He doesn't work. He thinks he can get by with his charm. He is lazy. He doesn't write down any assignments and he is completely unmotivated. I finally said that if he didn't pass the Big State Test, I was going to recommend that he be retained in the 5th grade.

All hell didn't break loose, but I think it was close.

So, now Bob and some of his closest friends are going to get a shot at summer school. If they pass the test, they get to go to 6th grade. If not, we get to discuss their futures.

Can't wait.

Testing, Day One

One of the ones fifth graders have to pass. Enough said.

I Can Do Anything For Twenty-Nine Days

Back in the classroom with a room full of geniuses who were mad they had to come back to school. I had a week's worth of review to do today for the Big State Test and they were, well, luke warm to the idea. Sorry, guys, but, I've got a week's worth of work for you every day. EVERY DAY until next Wednesday. And that's when the rubber meets the road.

Sharpen up those Dixon Ticonderogas and get another eraser.

And today, it felt as though it were the middle of January and not the middle of April. It is supposed to sleet and frost tonight. And then I read that it may get as high as 61 degrees tomorrow. Please.

Twenty-nine days and counting.

To Take a Title from Cupcake...

That's over and probably my teaching career.....

Writing assessments for fifth graders are meaningless. I still don't know exactly what it is the State wishes to understand about our ten year olds. And remember, they are just ten. Or eleven.

They are given a writing prompt - narrative, persuasive or informational - and 120 minutes to produce a finished piece. They are not allowed to use any kind of reference materials at all. They have written for the entire year; they shouldn't be surprised because they have done this before.

Well, guess what? I only had one student fall completely apart. He got the prompt that I handed out blind and immediately asked for a different one. Since I hadn't seen them, I handed them out the way I got them. I didn't know who would get what. He became extremely unhappy and shut down. He cried. He pouted. He laid his head down. And I was his cheerleader, but I had another student with the very same prompt who was having the same trouble. This other child didn't cry, but I could see he was panicked. We were 45 minutes into the test before he picked up his pencil and started. By then, I was e-mailing the teachers next door and the principals for instructions. And their instructions were: you've done all you could.

I refused to read what they wrote. Just like the big state tests coming up, I can't stand to see if they make mistakes. I know they are going to, so I just don't want to know what they are.

Oh, and how seriously was I taking today? I didn't turn on my alarm. I woke up 30 minutes before I was supposed to be behind my desk. Can you say "Super Big State Testing Jean Day?"

Monday, Monday

Monday. Two days before the writing assessment.

No one knows how to write, yet.

Worse, however, was how bad I felt this weekend. I was so knocked out with a migraine, I was in bed most of Saturday. Yes, I slept until 4:30 Saturday afternoon.

My nutritionist wanted me to go on a no carb diet. After spending a large amount of money, I realized that no carbs is no fun and no way to live. I was dreaming about toast. And milk and fruit. I hadn't even gotten to missing potatoes and spaghetti, yet. There has to be a better way to get rid of the muffin-top. Like exercising and eating right? That's my goal.

And my principal, in a state of do goodery, realized that some of us had been left out of Cupid fun, put gift bags in our mailboxes. She's one of the good ones.

First Thursday in October

Titles getting lame? About as lame as I feel.





Got some batteries for the camera. Too bad they aren't in the camera yet.





One more day of testing and then we get back to the education of America's youth. Would you believe that I've been in my pajamas since I got home from school? I picked up my cheerleader after the away game in them. (All right, all right. It was dark, people.) I need a weekend.

First Monday in October

• Supreme Court is back in session. Best job in the Federal Government.
• My neighborhood is already in Halloween mode: fake graveyards and skeletons crawling out of the ground are already popping up all over the place. I don't mind a scarecrow or two, but for heaven's sake people, this isn't Satan Estates. This crap gives me the creeps. And I have a whole month of it to look forward to. Yippee.
• Bob Marley and his new best friend, Bobbette (I kid you not, she did her hair just like his) , faked their way through the reading section of the Iowa Test of Basic Skills and then tried to sleep. NOT ON MY WATCH!!! I was shaking kids awake and making them go over it in the remaining time. Sleeping during a standardized test. Puhleeze.

No More Teachers, No More Books, Part Two

Praise the Lord in Heaven. Summer school ends tomorrow. I tested six kids today in reading. By reading the reading test outloud to them. All of it. The passages. The questions. The answer choices. I think I began to hyperventilate at some point. I have a migraine THIS BIG right now. It won't go away. I am going to bed and dream happy dreams.


What am I supposed to do tomorrow?

I have cleaned up my room and turned in all my stuff. The math kids test tomorrow. I am a reading teacher. I believe I will bring a book. It's all good.

Blogging, Journaling and the Last Gasps of Summer School

Just wondering... do all you bloggerss keep regular journals, too? I have in the past, but now that I spend all my time surfing the computer and teaching summer school, I find that I haven't journaled in a very long time. And what is really funny is that there have been a few times when I wanted to journal, but I haven't wanted to mess up my journal. OCD? Perhaps..

Oh yeah. The test is Wednesday and I have been chosen to be one of the teachers to read the test out loud. Correct-o. I am reading a reading test out loud to people who need to be able to read it to pass it. Am I the only one finding the irony in this situation? We have made accommodations for students who can't read and one of those accommodations is to read the test to them. Hello. I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

My one major question is who did I piss off? After all, I have to read directions, passages, questions and answer choices to these kids. That shouldn't take long or be too boring. One of them gets to write in the test booklet and I have to transfer his answers into the answer document after the test is over. WTH? My wedding anniversary is Tuesday. I wanted to go dancing, drink heavily and come into a nice quiet testing room on Wednesday. The last thing I want to hear is my own monotonous voice reading those tedious selections outloud. Just the nice sound of number two pencils making those little circles.

Tales from Summer School

Five more days until the big test... and my oldest student has been transferred. He tried to sleep through class yesterday. I think that's what did him in yesterday.

I thought that my classroom was the crazy one; however, I have been listening to my fellow summer school teachers and I realize that I am one of the lucky ones. I am down to three students. There are others who have as many as 14 students. Many of those kids are not on any of their meds for whatever ails them. Phew.

My students (the rest of them) are as different as they are every year. My girl failed the test because she said she fell asleep and when she woke up, she realized she had run out of time and just started marking answers. I don't doubt that. She is smart and she could be so much more than she thinks she is. Where was her testing teacher?

One of the boys has told me that just last year, he swam across the Rio Grande to get here. I didn't know whether to be proud of him for realizing that this is America, land of the free, home of the brave, or outraged because here I am, trying to educate an undocumented, illegal alien who has failed the all-important test and his failure reflects poorly on my adequate yearly progress. Whatever. He is trying. Sort of. I don't know if he even understands the importance of all this yet. He barely understands me. Which brings me to my next question: why are we TESTING someone in English when he doesn't even understand the language? Some of the data that I have read states that English language learners don't have the ability to truly comprehend English for at least seven years after they have come to this country. Why is this county and this country all hot and bothered to test these kids one year after they have even arrived? He can't pronounce the words yet. He doesn't even know what they mean.

So, here we are, trying to cram down, in fifteen days, what some of these kids haven't managed to learn in two tries at fifth grade. After all, some of the teachers have asked if we aren't going to get these kids student parking. When you get to fail as many times as these kids do, you're going to need a parking place and a prom. We are doing them a huge disservice. I just don't know how to undo it.

Big State Testing Results and the School Superintendent

Thursday, Kathy Cox came out all happy because the state test results came back and made her look good.

If anyone looked really hard at the results, they would have to realize that just passing the test doesn't make anyone really look good. It means that we got the kids ready to take a test. By passing the test with an 800, you have met standards. Meeting standards here means you have mastered about 40% of the material. FORTY PERCENT OF THE MATERIAL. You are not a rocket scientist; you have barely learned what you need to learn for the whatever grade you are in. Spend the summer watching TV and what not and you won't even have a grasp on that 40%.

The very same day, there was an article in the very same paper about a group of teachers who were studying about geography because our students don't have the first idea where anything is located in the world.

Today, the paper has an editorial about how our students don't know anything about history.

That is because we have stopped teaching what is important for what makes us look good. We don't teach them how to think or why it is important to know where things are or why the rules of spelling are important or why this novel is fun to read, just because; the state and federal government wants us to turn these children into robots who can read and calculate just enough to get by. The standards aren't good for teachers and they aren't good for students. Aren't we doing a disservice to the children by trying to make them all fit in the same mold? And aren't we doing ourselves a disservice by not teaching them that education can be fun and beautiful and challenging, all at the same time? Who is going to want to teach if it isn't fun anymore?

Vacation Blues

The first week of summer school is blissfully over; I quietly countdown the minutes as they tick away every day. I know that isn't a good thing to do as a teacher, but I'm not your ordinary teacher, I am a summer school teacher.

One huge concern in my room is the presence of a 13 1/2 year old 5th grader who is trying to pass the Super Big State Test. He is living in a homeless shelter. WTH has been my battle cry all week. Is anybody listening? Not until Thursday did someone really hear me and start to look into what has happened to this young man. Because really, if you are almost 14, you aren't a child anymore.


Another big concern in my room: several of the kids told me that they had just fallen asleep during the test. Again, WTH? I was told that I had to circulate, make sure everyone was on task, make sure everyone was on the right section. How do you let children fail by sleeping through the test? Uncaring and unprofessional. That's all. A few of my kids are smart; too smart to be where I am teaching.


BrownBear returned from a week at camp and slept for 14 hours upon her return. No, that isn't a typo - 14 hours. She appeared to PrepGirl and I yesterday at 2:00 PM. She said she wouldn't have gotten up at all if she hadn't had to go to the bathroom. I had been home from school for an hour and a half and I expected to be greated with shouts and cheers and "Let's go to the pool!" Instead, I got to find out what the evil Stefano was up to in the town of Salem.

So, five days of summer school down, 12 more teaching days until the big test.

Test Results

Super Big State Testing results came yesterday and ...... only 5 of our fifth graders didn't pass. Five - omgosh - I can remember one year when I had eight in my CLASS. I only had two and each of them only missed one section. One messed up the math and one messed up the reading.

I wasn't allowed to tell my class about their results because the principal hadn't gotten ahold of my students who had failed. Two whole classes of fifth graders passed and their teachers told them; my students got wind of it and began asking me about their results. Well, I had been told not to give those results out yet, so I had to tell them that the principal was calling the people who had failed. My kids began to wilt - and I just asked them over and over if they heard from the principal last night. How long did it take to sink in? If you hadn't gotten a call from the principal, you were fine.

Tequila tonight. Celebrate with the teachers at the big Spring Fling. (You know, I sound like a rowdy drunk and I'm really not. I will probably have a drink. But that will be enough. Because I work with these people and I don't need these stupid stories following me around. Like the toga story.) Happy Weekend. Five more days.

New Student Update

I lost the student who came to me during the middle of testing; she left Friday.

And guess what? I got a new student today. Uh huh. TODAY. One more Monday left and I get a new one. He's a great student, I was assured, but let me assure you that no one is a great student nine days before school is over. Because, really, I am trying to involve them in meaningful work, but they aren't cooperating. Would you?

My principal told me that the results for those who failed the Big Test would be available on Friday. Well, yippie dippie. No wonder I haven't been sleeping. We're having a big teacher party on Friday - margarita city, here I come. I hope LawyerBoy is coming, because he's going to be a-driving.

Beautiful May

Welcome, blessed May!! Only 19 more days until this year is over and we get some respite from this year. Writing test results came back yesterday and there were DNM results from people I am surprised by. Oh well; as we were told, the scores will be what they will be.

Leadership Retreat is all day today. That means shorts and a substitute for me.

I got a new student YESTERDAY but he is wonderful!!!! I wish he had been with me all year. I am supposed to get a new one TODAY. Remember, 19 days to go.