Sex in the City Day

Today should have been sex in the city day; however, our nurse-talker person managed to be involved in a three car wreck on her way to our school. Of course, we found out ten minutes before we were supposed to pick up our kids from specials and get them sorted and in their places for the big talk.

Now, my plan for today was to plan for the rest of the week and next week. I had no plans for today. Apparently, I am a veteran teacher of sorts. I flew by the seat of my pants, I did not panic and I did not resort to all day recess.

Our sex in the city day has been rescheduled for the end of February. After Valentine's Day. Much better, I think.

Mommy Day

Surprise day off! Since I am also known as Dr. Addison Montgomery, I should have been able to diagnose and treat the sinus infection I believe PrepGirl has; however, owing to the fact that Addie is an OB/GYN and my teaching certificate won't allow me to call in antibiotics, I am off to the shower and then off to the pediatrician with a big, sick, cheerleader who is so sick she doesn't want to go to the doctor. (What if he finds something else wrong with me?) I can't blame her but she can't go on like this. She made me lay down with her last night and pat her back until she fell asleep. Talk about days gone by....

Seriously?

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Nuts and Bolts

After reading about Cupcake's woes, I realized that this Wednesday is the dreaded Sex Day in the fifth grade. A licensed nurse visits our school for an entire day and directs our youth in the ways of their hormones. Literally, I could kill myself. For the past four years, I have had to sit in the back of the classroom and listen as the story of how you came to be is painfully told. Granted, the boys and girls are divided up, but still.

BrownBear said it was a weird day. You don't see the boys all day long and then, at the end of the day, when you do, well, it is, in a word, awkward.

My parents have returned these permissions slips like it is a permission slip to the Second Coming.

I had already spoken to both PrepGirl and BrownBear before the big class, but the day PrepGirl came home from this, she got off the bus, wide eyed. I couldn't imagine what she could be wide-eyed from, so, silly me; I asked her what was up.

"Well," she said, "they talked about the boy stuff. And there were overhead pictures." Of course. Overhead pictures of stuff you don't even want to think about, right there in your face.

I made sure to include the boy stuff in my talk with BrownBear.

Conference Week Roundup

• Bob Marley's mom came - late - apple doesn't fall far from the tree - and she told me that she doesn't agree with him having to take the Super Big State Test because she knows that he is smart; she believes he is almost gifted (!), but I told her I had neither written nor passed the legislation, I just had to get him through the test. I also told her that he was basically counting on his fingers when we were doing timed multiplication tests. That he was reading at least two grades below grade level. That he can't string coherent sentences together. She found that hard to believe. I want to know what part of FantasyLand she is living in and when I can get my condo.
• The sweetest kid in my class is also the MOST unorganized boy in my room. He might win an award for being one of the most unorganized kids I have ever met. His parents came today and his dad (Mr. Trial Attorney/Mr. Anal Retentive/Mr. BlueTooth in His Ear ALL THE DAMNED TIME/Mr. Indiana Jones Hat on His Head) asked what he could do for his kid. (How sweet to hear those words.) I assured him that half the kids had the same problem and I suggested that Mr. Anal Retentive come one afternoon and give a pep talk, organizational lecture on how to keep your desk, notebook and backpack organized. AND HE SAID YES.
• Only one parent stood me up.
• No one yelled.
• No one cried.
• I understand my kids SO MUCH after seeing and hearing their parents.
• The ones in denial are in deep, deep denial (she knows her facts at home) but everyone else understands what strengths and weaknesses their children have.
• Scary Principal Daddy is a pompous ass. If he can be in administration in this county, your monkey's uncle could probably be in administration.
• I came home and slept the sleep of the dead. (Chinese food all around) Conference week is the most mind boggling, time consuming, life sucking week of the year. There has to be a better way and somebody's monkey's uncle needs to find it.

The Week That REALLY Kicked My Butt

My word. Will it ever end? I can do these conferences in my sleep. Grades, Iowas, CRCT concerns, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I am beginning to sound like Charlie Brown's school teacher.

Scary Principal Daddy came today with his ex-wife and brrrrr, was there a chill in the air. She couldn't have given him a colder shoulder if she had brought some dry ice with her. (And you know what? A freaking cold front slammed through right about the same time. It was scary, I tell you.) Damn. I could hardly talk, what with watching the two of them not. He sort of threw me, because of his last exhibition but he put on his party manners today and behaved. Now, I don't know what's up with that because he can be an ASS. Am I waiting for the other shoe to drop? You bet I am.

I have been ever so cautious this week - you never know who is coming to a conference, gunning for you. I have two tomorrow that could go bad in the blink of an eye or they could be just peachy. You never know.

Conference Week

In the past, our county has mandated two conference weeks; one in the fall and one in the spring. Apparently, we have wasted too much time with parents by doing this, so this year, the powers that be decided to consolidate our conferences into January conference week. Five days of conferences, starting the day after the MLK holiday. All of these days are early release days which mean that I lose the little darlings at 12:10. I'm just getting warmed up at 12:10, people. By said dismissal, we've had to cram in our specials and lunch. My team insists on teaching math and then I insist on a little Social Studies and Reading. And bibbidy bobbidy boo... the school day is magically over and parents begin to invade my private space.



Today wasn't as bad as I expected. Of course, there was the parent who told me her daughter did know her math facts at home. (Well, she doesn't know them or won't do them at school. She managed to get an F in math from her math teacher - phew- it wasn't me - but, by golly, she knows her facts.) And, I haven't had my conference with scary assistant principal daddy. So, we'll see how it goes. After all, tomorrow is Wednesday.

Snow Day, Part 2

This is what cancelled churches across the metropolitan area. Churches, people. Now, maybe it was the black ice, but, by golly, they cancelled church. IHOP and Waffle House? Open. Target? Open. I understand that Methodists and Baptists need an occasional snow day; but, people, some of the Catholic churches called it. The Catholics!!! I didn't think Catholics called it for anything. I remember as a child Mass in Latin, nuns in full habit and fish on Friday; never in the rule book did it state 'we'll close for snow days in the south.' I mean, didn't they have mass in Green Bay?

Whatever. I'll take a snow day in any form. I mean, really. I just got ready for the day. And I think that I'll be going to bed shortly. Well, maybe after that Green Bay game. After all, I really want to see what cold looks like.

We Got Dusted

For about two hours, this is what the deep south looked like. I had to drive around in it. I walked around in it and it was luscious.

Then, it started to rain. RAIN. When does it snow first and then rain?

But that's all right. It was lovely for a while. And today, well, I had the foresight to take a personal day to take care of some personal business.

The Wave of the Future

Could this be it? And the Golden Globe goes to... And the Academy Award goes to... It might be fast but it is just as dull.

My New Best Friend

Mercifully, the week from hell ended and LawyerBoy took a few of us to LawyerBoy Club for Martini Night. I met my new best friend there - they call it a New Yorker. Jack Daniels, grenadine and a splash of lime juice. Let me just say that it washed this week right out of my hair. And I'm none the hung over.

If Someone Had Bribed Me to Read...

Tomorrow, my teaching partner and I are having our celebration for those students who have made the required number (20) of Accelerated Reader Points for the past nine weeks. I agree that 20 is lame; however, for some of my students, it is a struggle to get AR points. Some others, though? Not a big deal. I have several students who have close to 100 points and my star? He's got 270 for this nine weeks - down from his 300 for the first nine weeks.

Now, my unmotivated students? Pure unmitigated disregard for the entire reading process. The assistant principal's daughter? One point. ONE. She won't be celebrating with us.

Let me just say that when I was in the fifth grade, I lived in the library. I remember reading everything, everywhere. I remember getting the World Book Encyclopedias for one of my birthdays. I would sit and read those. If there was going to be a party for people who read, I would have been there. I don't get the ones who won't even read for the party.

The Week that Kicked My Butt

I believe that it is Wednesday. Just ending, I think. And I have TWO more days to go this week. If yesterday was the day that wouldn't end, today is its little brother. I know that it is hard getting back into the routine, but honestly, I looked at the clock several times yesterday, just to see that the minute hand hadn't moved at all. I thought I was going to perish in a twilight zone of never ending Tuesday. And then it was the sequel, never ending Wednesday.

What the Hey?

Thanks to the ever gracious Poppy for showing me this.

69% Bill Richardson
68% Rudy Giuliani
63% Mike Huckabee
62% Mitt Romney
60% Hillary Clinton
60% John McCain
58% John Edwards
57% Chris Dodd
57% Barack Obama
56% Fred Thompson
54% Tom Tancredo
52% Joe Biden
46% Mike Gravel
42% Dennis Kucinich
40% Ron Paul

2008'>http://www.gotoquiz.com/candidates/2008-quiz.html">2008 Presidential Candidate Matching Quiz

I said that I would support the first candidate who said he'd/she'd do away with NCLB. And on Saturday night, Bill Richardson said just that.

I guess he's waiting for his $4300 check.

And someone explain how Bill Richardson and Rudy Giuliani can be this close. Just what were the questions?

Not to Be Undone by Technology

Finally, I have managed to write a list and post it as a sidebar. While not a major accomplishment for some of you, I have been huffing and puffing like the Big, Bad Wolf trying to get this minor technological achievement accomplished.

What I really need is a new page. When I first began this endeavor, I thought that the standard blogger page would be enough. But as I travel around the blogsphere, I am taken by all the wonderful pages I encounter. However, I am accomplished at many things - code writing and web page design are not two of them.

So, what's a girl to do?

You Are a Cappuccino

You're fun, outgoing, and you love to try anything new. However, you tend to have strong opinions on what you like. You are a total girly girly at heart - and prefer your coffee with good conversation. You're the type that seems complex to outsiders, but in reality, you are easy to please

What Kind of Coffee Girl Are You?

Saturday Night Follies

As Cupcake has pointed out, my beloved Redskins played like a high school team tonight. I wouldn't be on that plane home with them from Seattle.

Now, Charlie Gibson and ABC News are trying to scare the hell right out of me. Nuclear terrorism, Osama Bin Laden and Pakistan? On a Saturday night? With Hillary, Barack and John. Oh, yeah. And with that Bill Richardson. Mr. Two Percent.

I have just finished grading some Math tests that I need for Monday morning.

It looks like I need to get a social life. Desperately.

Seven Random Facts

Mrs. Bluebird tagged me for the seven random facts meme a while ago and Christmas caught me off guard. So, here's your seven facts, in no particular order.

• I serve sweet iced tea for dinner every single night. Regardless of weather. (Last night, it was about 25 degrees here, but we served up some iced tea.) I live in the South; I was drinking iced tea for dinner when I was tiny and don't see myself stopping in the near future.
• Chick-Fil-A is my favorite fast food restaurant. I sometimes stop for the sweet iced tea. See above. (However, in Denver one time, they just looked at me like I was some kind of freak and told me where I could locate the sugar. WTH? It was a Chick-Fil-A. Chicken sandwich, waffle fries and a sweet tea.)
• I once lost my slip in the Rayburn Building of the House of Representatives. I was delivering some document during college break - I had a fantastic job with the Environmental Protection Agency- and the stupid thing just fell right off. On the floor, in the hallway. I kicked it aside and kept on walking. Don't know who found it and I don't care.
• Having younger daughters has definitely kept me younger. I am thinking about lying about how old I am and seeing if I can get away with it.
• After teaching high school for a year, I taught in a funeral service school - English Literature, English Composition and U.S. History- in their Associate Degree Program. If that won't get you back in the "real" world, nothing will.
• I collect snowmen for Christmas. Especially snowmen salt and pepper shakers. Now I am afraid that I have become the great aunt who collected salt and pepper shakers and filled up her china cupboard with them.
• I'm thinking about trying to get into graduate school - but I can think of a billion reasons why it isn't the right time to do it. First and foremost, I've got to take Prep on some college trips next year - how much fun is that going to be?- but every time I look at graduate catalogs, I can't decide which department and I wonder where am I going to get the tuition for all three of us to go to school and ..... well, you get the picture. But, I think I really want to teach high school or maybe even college, because these elementary preps are killing me. So, we'll see.

That's it. All the oddness teachergirl could muster. I'm supposed to tag some others, but if you're reading and you're up to it, you should do it. And let me know.

A Happy New Year!!

Best wishes for all those wonderful things a new year is to bring!!!

Happy New Year!!